This Is Their Journey
by WankyBrittanaLover
Summary: A little one-shot to give all you Brittana shippers some faith and hope. Enjoy:)


"I'm going in." I whisper to Santana on the line. I gently put my phone in my pocket, making sure I don't hang up. I look at Brittany, who's still in the choir room, through the door. She's still crying, it's obvious. She's been crying ever since Santana left almost two hours ago. I don't even think that crying this much is healthy, but we've let her cry until she gets tired of it, which backfired because here I am two hours later about to go in to try to make her stop. Honestly, us, the New Directions, we didn't know what to do. We've never really faced a broken Brittany, just a depressed one. And we managed to make everything worse for a depressed Brittany, so we learned our lesson and we gave her some space.

We all hated it, giving her some space because we screwed up last time. But thing is that we weren't giving her space because of that; we were giving her space because neither of us knew what to do. Will tried to help, but her sobs turned into screaming so he got scared and left. When he came back, he brought Emma, but Brittany locked the door before they could go in. After a while, she unlocked in, probably hoping Santana would rush through the door telling her it was a mistake, but she never did. The rest of us were still taking in the fact that Santana broke up with her. We were all in a room for what felt like an hour, hearing her cries across the hall, too scared to actually do anything about it. Everything was hitting me harder because I couldn't understand why they broke up. It's not like them at all. I know them, maybe even better than they know themselves, so seeing their break up totally took me by surprise. I know that they love each other. I know that they're the perfect one true pair. I know that they've gone through hell and back to be together. What I don't know is why they would let something so precious fall apart so easily? Honestly I couldn't believe it. I didn't even know what was going to happen to me because I was still taking things in. I just needed answers, and that's exactly what I looked for.

Blaming my Aspergers, I called Santana, praying she would pick up, and she did. After begging for answers and fighting with Santana to get them for about 20 minutes, she finally opened up because even though she didn't want to admit it, the pain was eating her alive and she needed to talk about it.  
"I had to do it." She said, barely above a whisper  
"Why?" I asked.  
"Because it's the right thing to do."  
"Why?"  
"Because I can't make her happy."  
"Why?" I asked for the third consecutive time.  
"I don't know, Sugar! Ok?! I don't know! I had some real, clear answers for your idiotic questions when I was doing it and even before that but now it all feels like a blur!"  
"Maybe because it was a mistake." I stated, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.  
She sighted. "Maybe." I waited for her to start talking again, and she did. "But right now I can't do anything about it. She deserves to be happy and I can't make her happy anymore."  
"You're right. You just make her miserable."  
"Thank you Sugar, for your remarkable support." Said Santana. I swear I heard her roll her eyes.  
"How can I agree with you when you made the biggest mistake of your life and you're too stubborn to see it? God, Santana, you're so stupid! You're so selfish and inconsiderate! The poor girl is crying her guts out and-"  
"She's still crying?" She cut me off, completely ignoring my insults. Another sign that told me that she was just as destroyed as Brittany.  
"Yes. I hope you're happy."  
"Oh god... I never thought she'd react like this... Shit..." She said, more to herself than to me.  
"Well, how did you think she was going to react?" I asked her.  
"I don't know. I really don't know." She admitted. We both stayed quiet for about a minute, then she started talking again. "Why do you even care?" She asked, letting her usual bitchiness take over.  
"Because all the glee club members want to help. Brittany literally broke a few feet away from us and we don't know what to do. We need to fix this." I lied. I wanted to help. I didn't know what to do. I needed to fix this before it was too late. Not the New Directions.  
"Well what the hell do you want me to do, Sugar? I can't go back and get back together with her, ok? I just can't. She needs to be happy and I can't be the amazing girlfriend she deserves right now if I can barely even talk to her. You may not understand why but us being together right now is not an option."  
"You're right."  
"Thank you for-"  
"No, you're right, I don't understand."  
Santana sighted, clearly trying to gain some patience. "Obviously there's nothing I can do."  
"Just tell her you love her and for her to wait for you." I suggested because they couldn't be over. If they are... I can't even think about that possibility.  
"I can't do that! That's extremely selfish!"  
"Wasn't the whole Artie thing selfish enough? What makes this any different?" I asked trying to get her back to her senses.  
"I was a kid back then. I've matured."  
"Just because you've matured, doesn't mean you have to let go."  
Santana sighted after I said those words. She knew I was right. I'll always have the words of wisdom for Santana, even if she doesn't know why.  
"I can't do that to her."  
Then I got a 'brilliant' idea. "What if somebody else does it?"

And that's how I ended up where I am right now, in front of the choir room looking at Brittany cry. I honestly can't believe I let Santana get me involve in this, even though I am already involved. I wanted answers and I got them, but now I'm supposed to use my knowledge and help Brittany. Problem is that I don't know how to do it. Making people feel better was never my thing. Neither was singing, which made my parents wonder if I was really their kid. But that doesn't matter right now; all that matters is that I have to make things better.

I slowly open the door, scared that I might make her start screaming again. She's calmer, even if she's still crying, which is good. Not the crying part, but the calmer one. She looks up, almost excitedly, but as soon as she sees me, her hopeful look fades away and she looks down. I start walking forward, hoping that she doesn't break down again because I wouldn't know what to do. She doesn't stop me nor encourages me, so I keep walking forward. Once there is one chair between us, I start talking.  
"Hi." I say softly and sweetly, hoping to regain her attention which was now invested on her feet.  
She doesn't say anything.  
"How are you?" After those words leave my mouth, I feel stupid for asking. Of course she's not ok! Why would I ask that? God, I'm horrible at making people feel better.  
I decide to sit right next to her, waiting for her to say something since all I hear from her are sniffles. I start to tap my feet against the floor since the silence is becoming unbearable, even if I've only been here for around two minutes. I notice that the musicians are still here. They look like if they're scared to leave. They give me a 'please do something' look and I just nod, not sure what I can do. We keep quiet for a few more minutes and I already feel like I failed epically. I keep looking at Brittany who keeps looking down so I just keep tapping my feet. I check my phone, just to find Santana still on the line. My phone buzzes on my head, meaning I just got a text. I open the text, not hanging up on Santana, and I read a text from her.

**From: Santana (2:34 PM) don't just tap your feet like an idiot, DO SOMETHING!**

Now I'm starting to panic. I don't know what to do and I know I have to do something. I look back at the musicians and I give THEM a 'please do something' look. They start talking among themselves and go to their instruments. The piano player, whose name I always forget, nods at me, basically trying to tell me that he knows what to do. I nod back, trusting him enough. Then, music fills the choir room.

Once the song starts playing, I quickly recognize it. I look at the piano player in disbelief. I can't believe he would dare to play that song. Especially now. I look at Brittany, to scared of what I will find, but surprisingly I find Brittany smiling. Crying, but smiling. It's almost as if the song brought back all the happy emotions that the same melody once gave her. That song will always make her smile. That's a fact. I can't believe I actually doubted the piano player, even for a second. He HAS gone through a lot with us. He may know us better than what we know each other. Santana called him furniture, but he was more than that. He was our diary. Our helper. Our friend. He always played the right key to every song, both literally and poetically speaking. He knew so much about us. He knew all the songs that we needed to hear. So he knew that playing an instrumental version of Songbird for Brittany would be enough to make her feel better. And it did.

As the music keeps playing, Brittany just closes her eyes and keeps smiling. Tears are still dripping from her eyes, but now I don't know if they are happy tears or sad tears. Maybe a little bit of both. She starts rocking her body, following the song's rhythm. If somebody else would have seen her, they would have thought she was crazy. But I didn't because I knew her. I knew she was imagining Santana right in front of her, singing that song. Just like she did two years ago.

The song finished around a minute ago, but Brittany is still smiling. After a few more minutes, she opens her eyes. Quickly, her smile turns into a frown. Instead of looking at the floor again, she looks at me straight in the eyes. I gulp, because I still don't know what to say. She notices, so she looks at my chair instead.  
"She used to sit there. Always." She says, starting to smile again. I think she wasn't really telling me, I think she was reminding herself that because she knows that I know. But I let her keep talking, because this is better than silence. "She said that she used to sit there to secretly watch me. She also said that she'd count the times I would smile at her and she would die on the days I didn't."  
"No offense, but she sounds like a stalker." I say, quickly regretting it. She looks up and gives me a 'what the hell is the matter with you' glare, so I decide to take it all back. "I'm sorry. I just don't know what to say."  
Brittany looks at the floor again and whispers something to me. "She always knows what to say."  
I stay quiet for a few more seconds, analyzing my next words carefully so I don't mess up again. "That's all part of being a lover."  
"And a best friend." She says, starting to weakly smile again.  
"Of course." I add.  
She looks back at me, looking in my eyes for something. Probably the same answer I was looking for. "Why has everything been taken away from me?" She asks me with new tears formed on her eyes.  
I look at her, not sure how I can answer the question. I start thinking of millions of ways to answer, but she interrupts my thoughts. "I lost my presidency. I'm not president of the glee club either. I'm a senior again. And most importantly, I lost Santana. Why?"  
She looks down again.  
I honestly don't know what to say. I keep thinking of ways I could answer that question and nothing comes up. Sometimes, I wish I was like Brittany. Brittany always knows what to say. Best part is that she doesn't think of an answer, she just says whatever feels right. That's something I was never able to learn from her. But today, I decide to give it a try. "I don't think you lost anything. I think that since you were once class president, somebody else deserves a shot. I think that since you're one of the main cheerios, somebody else should be the new Rachel. I think that since you were given another chance to make a better senior year, you should appreciate it. But most importantly, I think that you didn't lose Santana. I think this is just temporary. Something to help you both grow as a couple."  
"How do you know?" She asks with a shaky voice.  
"Because you two are soul mates. You belong together."  
"I used to believe that. But now I'm starting to doubt it."  
I keep looking at her intensely. Scared of screwing everything up. I decide to take her hand, making her look up at me, and tell her something that maybe I shouldn't tell her. Or maybe I should. Either way, I took the chance.  
"You know how I imagine you two in a few years?" I ask.  
"How?" She asks.  
"Close your eyes'." She closes her eyes. "I imagine you two together. I imagine you two, about to get married. I imagine you in a beautiful strapless white dress and I imagine her in a simpler dress. I imagine a famous Santana, star struck by your beauty. I imagine all the New Directions around, crying and smiling because the best Lebanese couple is getting married." She giggles, so I continue. "I imagine paparazzi, trying to break in the wedding of one of the most famous dancers in LA and one of the most famous singers in the world. I imagine Santana going all Lima Heights on their asses for disrupting your wedding. I imagine you trying to calm her down and she does because she loves you so. I imagine you two going on an awesome honeymoon in Hawaii. I imagine you two moving in a huge house with Lord Tubbington. I imagine you two always treating each other like queens. I imagine you getting pregnant and having a kid. A girl, precisely. I imagine Santana letting you name her, mainly because she was scared of giving the baby a name that would make them a target for the rest of her life. So you name her after your favorite food."  
"Fondue?" She asks, smiling.  
"I imagine you having... Um... Sweeter taste in a few years." I answer, gaining her contagious smile.  
"Like Candy?" She asks.  
"Something like that." I answer. "I imagine you two raising her and loving her. I imagine Santana at first scared of raising a kid, but in time, she gets to accept herself and she lets herself become part of the girl's life."  
"She'd make an awesome mom, wouldn't she?" She asks, still with her eyes closed and smiling.  
"The best." I answer as honestly as I can. "I imagine you two fighting against every obstacle together and winning them all because you two are the best duo ever. I imagine a lifetime of happiness for you two. I imagine you two loving each other until the day you die. Probably even after that. And all of that won't go to waste over a break up. Because love is love. And THIS is love."  
She opens her eyes and lets out a few tears. "I hope so." She says.  
"I know so." I answer. She's still smiling, so I know that I must have done something right. She goes to her own little world again, which seems brighter now. I decide that maybe she wants to be alone so I stand up to leave.  
"I think I better go." I say. "But if you need anything you can talk to me."  
"I know, Sugar." She says smiling. "Thank you. Really."  
"My pleasure." And with that I leave the room.

Once outside, I take out my phone to talk to Santana who's still on the line.  
"Hey." I say.  
She stays quiet.  
"Santana?"  
She stays quiet again.  
"Hellooooo?"  
"Thank you." She says in between sniffles.  
"You don't have to thank me." I say.  
"I do. I needed her to know how much I love her and that what we still have is real. And you did just that. So thank you."  
"Well, you're welcome." I say smiling.  
"You really believe we're meant to be?" She asks.  
"I know you're meant to be."  
After a few minutes of silence, I speak up again. "So I have to go. But call me if you need anything."  
"Ok." She says quickly, getting awkward for letting someone in her life the way she let me in. "Bye."  
"Bye." And we hang up.  
After I hang up, I start regretting telling them both what I just told them. I don't know if they'll make it. I hope they do, for my sake, but I don't know that. What if they don't make it? What then? As much as I hate the idea, I don't know anything... Nobody knows anything...

I check the time on my phone, but instead I look at my screensaver and see the picture of Santana and Brittany holding me the day I was born. I check my photo gallery and find a lot of pictures of me with my two moms; the most amazing parents in the world. I came back to see the best love story with my own eyes because sometimes it feels so unreal. I've learned so many things about them. Things I hope they never forget. Things I know they will never forget. Because this is their journey and they'll end up back together. Because that's just how fate works. Because fate has laid a hand. That's what Santana always told me. Yes, they never told me they broke up. Yes, I don't know if this was supposed to happen. But these pictures, even if they haven't been taken yet, remind me that they're made of pure love. And no break up will ever change that. "Moms will be ok." I whisper to myself, letting myself smile, and I walk away, not letting my Brittana heart lose hope.


End file.
